In honour of the Oscars biting it because of the writer’s strike, I’ve arranged a series of Bob Hope quotes to keep you entertained while I’m in Canada for the next week or so. Those of you still slogging, or not baking cookies, feel free to discuss freely the events of the day in the comments.

Goes to a Gridiron Dinner honoring President Roosevelt:

Good evening Mr President, distinguished guests, I was late getting here because we flew through mud all the way, and then coming in from the airport I was on the bottom layer of the taxi. But I’m delighted to be here. I’ve always wanted to be invited to one of these dinners, and my invitation has been a long time in coming. I thought I had been vetoed by [Alben] Barkley [a senator who was giving the president a hard time in Congress]. Perhaps I shouldn’t mention Alben here… it’s too much like talking about Frank Sinatra to Bing Crosby.